[All of this is wrong. It's wrong and it's not what should be happening and it hurts, like he was getting stabbed over and over and over.
Handy to have around - like he was some sort of tool to be easily used and then discarded when it was no longer necessary. Which...was exactly the situation, wasn't it? Adachi fostered all of their friendship, lying to his face, apparently not giving one single damn about him while he was the idiot who trusted with all his heart - all in order so he had someone willing to defend him.
And god, it sure worked, didn't it? He'd ruined Ichigo and Yosuke's friendship just so Ichigo could still be on his side when it mattered.
But what hurts the absolute most is those final, sneered questions lobbied at him. Accusing him of being just like the detective, using Adachi for his own gain...]
No!
[Rage, hot and boiling, rises up in him - mixed with sorrow and anguish, and his own self-hatred that he couldn't see this coming earlier, see the snake that had wound it's way around his heart and head until he was slapping away the hands that were trying to reach out to him the entire time.]
I never once used you, goddamnit! I tried to be there for you - help you no matter what or whatever anyone said about you!
[He takes in a deep breath, and before he even realizes it...]
All I cared about was if you were okay, because you'd always been there for me! I believed in you, no matter what!
[...Tears are trickling down his cheeks, welling up in his red eyes as he screams out everything he has.]
You were someone I looked up to, Adachi! Someone I thought I should try to be like, and I...And I-!
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Handy to have around - like he was some sort of tool to be easily used and then discarded when it was no longer necessary. Which...was exactly the situation, wasn't it? Adachi fostered all of their friendship, lying to his face, apparently not giving one single damn about him while he was the idiot who trusted with all his heart - all in order so he had someone willing to defend him.
And god, it sure worked, didn't it? He'd ruined Ichigo and Yosuke's friendship just so Ichigo could still be on his side when it mattered.
But what hurts the absolute most is those final, sneered questions lobbied at him. Accusing him of being just like the detective, using Adachi for his own gain...]
No!
[Rage, hot and boiling, rises up in him - mixed with sorrow and anguish, and his own self-hatred that he couldn't see this coming earlier, see the snake that had wound it's way around his heart and head until he was slapping away the hands that were trying to reach out to him the entire time.]
I never once used you, goddamnit! I tried to be there for you - help you no matter what or whatever anyone said about you!
[He takes in a deep breath, and before he even realizes it...]
All I cared about was if you were okay, because you'd always been there for me! I believed in you, no matter what!
[...Tears are trickling down his cheeks, welling up in his red eyes as he screams out everything he has.]
You were someone I looked up to, Adachi! Someone I thought I should try to be like, and I...And I-!
[I was wrong. I was taken in by your lies.
I am the biggest fool who has ever lived.]
YOU WERE MY FRIEND, ADACHI!